It's the two month anniversary of my friend's death today. It is also his wife's birthday. What a great reminder every year, huh? I spoke to her this morning and she was miserable, and was dealing with a hangover from last nights festivites. Needless to say, she was not really in the mood for conversation.
I can not imagine how she must feel. My husband annoys the hell out of me on a daily basis, he goes on deployments to fight for his country, risking his life, but I can not fathom what it must feel like to lose a spouse. Watching them die is something else altogether. I am an extremely strong person, and have been through quite a bit in the little time I've been here on Earth, but I do not feel that I would have the strength to deal with someone that close to me dying.
I am really excited to take the death and dying class next semester. For some reason, I am fascinated by that concept lately, and surely just because of Tracky's death.
I wrote a song about death once. It was written because it seemed that everyone I knew had someone die on them.... all within two weeks of each other. All my friends were miserable, and it felt like the life was gone from them, too.
The song is now one of my favorites of mine. If anyone is interested, it can be heard at www.myspace.com/avengelyna
It is called 'Convulserator'.
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